Thursday, October 8, 2009

Sexual Misconduct Policy Committee


In past blogs I mentioned my hope of meeting with the Sexual Misconduct Task Force from the Disciples of Christ region. I knew a task force had been appointed to look into issues I had complained about 2 1/2 years ago. I had been told they would contact me, but when it didn't happen, I let it go. My identity is no longer founded in the past abuse. I really wasn't eager to stir it up again.

This past May I was contacted once again and this time they asked to meet with me. Having already been provided with my written suggestions, the committee had begun a rough draft of the new policy. I was sent a copy to review. Parts were good, parts needed work.

One issue I pushed for was immediate psychological testing of anyone accused of misconduct. How easy abusers pull the wool over people's eyes. Other issues included an open policy concering information provide by the accused. When I made my report, it was read verbatum to the minister, but I was not allowed access to his response. I felt abused again by the church. I was being exposed and he was being protected.

Years went by after my reporting him until my disatisfaction lead to my confrontation of him 2 years ago. So much emotion was ripped back open.....though it was a good experience for me and I have since moved on in ways I might never have.

This summer committee listened intently to my suggestions. I was shown very obvious respect and kindness. It was a good experience. I hope the new policy will help others in my shoes. It should be completed and voted on this November. I should probably write and ask for an updated draft. Whatever the end product, a victim and the church met and agreed on a great deal. It was good to experience unity and God's love in such a way.

5 comments:

Rev. Mike said...

Hi Di,

I'm glad that you are writing again. I placed you on my blogroll in hopes that your voice minister to others in ways that mine could not. I have read your blog and I admire you for what you have shared. Just keep writing with the understanding that someone is always waiting on your next post.

di said...

Wow. Thank you so much for the encouragement. The times I have been silent have been very personal times, often filled with issues of shame. Hmm. Maybe I will post on my quietness at times. Di

Anonymous said...

I just found your blog and am not sure how to post a comment. I will try and see if this works.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for being brave enough to host this blog. I have passed it along to my daughter and will be watching for changes.

di said...

Thanks for commenting and letting me know you there. Life itself takes courage and courage is certainly not the lack of fear. It is putting one foot in front of the other.