Contacting the Regional Minister about Clergy Sexual Misconduct Procedures

The ball is rolling and so are my tears.

In this denomination, of which I linger on the edge, there is no Bishop but a body of ministers from within the region who hire a minister to oversee the region's activities and procedures. The body of ministers is elected each year at the regional assembly and they in turn hire the regional minister and associate regional ministers. Together they all form what is known as the Comminssion on Ministry.

Last week I emailed this region's Regional Minister. He received my email on Monday and took a few days to reply. I am meeting with him on July 31st to share about my meeting with Bob and the ideas about sexual misconduct procedures that have come from the meetings.

So why the tears? I am not sure. It feels very tender inside doing this. I feel more vulnerable now than I did facing Bob. The same way Tom has more power in my life, I guess. I had pretty much stripped Bob of all power prior to meeting with him.

I wonder why I do this to myself. John wanted me to wait and take some time off but I had already emailed AND my days of vacation are numbered. Once work starts back, I can't hop in the car and drive 100 miles to meet with someone. It would have been easier to just quit where I am but I can't. Is it that I am not yet finished? Or is it that this is the beginning of a new chapter that lies ahead of me.

In the same way I felt that talking with Bob was a prerequisite to my sharing with other ministers and professionals, I feel that talking with those in this denomination, that I almost call my own, must happen before I can turn and look across the fields at other lands. If I can't face those I have a connection with then it somehow seems irresponsible to head off to other lands. These people have a reason to listen to me. It was their minister who abused me. It is their ordained minister who has walked beside me for 9 months now supporting my healing.

However, in the same way that family has access to deep places in our hearts and power that we sometimes are reticent to give them, so does this regional minister seem to have power of position in my life.

I shared briefly what I wanted to talk with Reg about. I also shared that this is not easy for me but I feel I must do it. I am encouraged by his reply to me.

Di, Be calm and know that I am sympathetic to you and to what you have
been through. I’d like to talk with you and hear what you have to
say.
I’ve got time set aside on the 31st at 1:30 in the afternoon.
I’ll look
forward to meeting with you then. Blessings.

I keep reading the "be calm" part! I am convinced this step is necessary and part of God's hand on my life. As usual I expect God to accomplish many things in this meeting. One of them will hopefully be more of my own healing. Far more important though, is the need to protect further victims from falling prey to pastoral predators. Now that is an oxymoron - pastoral predators!

Di