Monitoring the Perpetrator

Yesterday I learned that Bob had been monitored by a congregant after my report of his abuse. What Reg could not tell me was why Bob was unaware there had been any monitoring. My questions to Reg seemed to cause a lot of squirming on his part. Had this person reported back to the state board of ministers? Had anyone followed up as the years passed? Did this person stay a member of the church? Did they have any training to know what to look for? Are they still alive?

Reg, knew his answers were not satisfactory.

Today I talked with my pastor, Tom who is convinced Reg will follow up. Tom says Reg will do his best to meet my needs and to give him time to deal with the emotional bomb that has gone off in his lap. Not that I am a bomb but what happened to me is. Tom described how the shock of it affected him, how wrapping one's mind around the reality of what all I told him was difficult.

When Tom said that if nothing happened over a few months time to cause changes to be made to the policy, he would make sure something happened, I cried. I believe him. I trust him. When I shared my concern that Reg did not believe my evaluation of the three conversations with Bob, Tom agreed to call him and tell him his rendition as a support of mine.

I trust a pastor. Radical.

I miss my brother who was a pastor in the state, in this denomination and once the head of the state ministerial committee. Why didn't tell him? Oh how I wished I had. Yesterday my sister-in -law assured me that he would have supported me and helped me find resolution. Oh how good it was to hear that. And today I told Tom that though I had lost my brother as an advocate, I had gained his support - and it means a lot.

I wrote an email to Reg. I reminded him of the scripture of the 99 sheep that were left to seek out the one lost. Will this church choose to seek victims out when it is known they probably exist? I do not think I will be able to quit until I see that in writing.

Di